Exploring Our Core Believing – Our Blind Spots

Often the more intelligent we are, the more complex the labyrinth of “Blind Spots” we have to deal with in life. Being smart is no inoculation.  The more deeply we believe anything, the more profoundly it filters our perceptions. It is important for us to become aware of what we believe deeply at our core. We can learn to see our “Blind Spots” through a non-judgmental lantern. This "No-Fault Learning" approach makes healthy change possible.

The sad truth is that most Adult Children believe deeply that there is something terribly wrong with us at our core, and we spend a lifetime trying to make up for it – creating a SURVIVAL mentality, which filters everything we experience. We try to hide or get rid of unwanted parts of ourselves, preventing our healing supervision and parenting of those wounded parts.

There is a profound difference between surviving and living - very different software. In reality, the only thing really wrong with most of us is the fundamental fear/belief that there is something terribly wrong with us at our core. If that sounds like a circle, it's because it is a vicious circle. This is a belief worth challenging and replacing with healthy truth. We can all learn to enjoy the adventure of becoming - experiencing living imperfectly. It is an ongoing process of believing the truth imperfectly – practice, practice, practice!

That which we try hardest to forget, impacts us most powerfully, at the core level of our identity. What we don’t remember really can hurt us. Notice what happens when we try very hard “Not to think of the color purple.” The harder we try not to feel something, the stronger the underlying feeling becomes. This is also true of thoughts, and actions. We cannot hate or shame ourselves into healthy living. There is another way.   

The more desperately we try to intellectually remember healthy truths in our recovery, and hold on to those truths intellectually; the easier it is to forget those truths at the core level of believing. Recovery is not an intellectual exercise of rules to follow or remember; it is a change of fundamental perception, experienced at the level of "believing-in-action."

It is choosing to live consciously in the present, experiencing believing our identity as becoming; feeling good about noticing changes we want to make in our life today. Healthy change can become the path of least resistance in our daily living.